Bouquets of girls
By Lynn Yaney, Public Information Officer, Employment and Human Services
One of the girls drifts through the kitchen and calls out hopefully, “Are you gonna use these chocolate chips for pancakes?” “No,” replies Delphia Lawson, “They’re for frosting on the cake I just made.”
Either way, it sounded to me like there was some very kid-happy meal preparation going on in this kitchen in Pittsburg.
Delphia Lawson fosters siblings. “I hate to see kids split up,” she explains, “It’s bad enough being away from their mom and dad, but to take them away from each other is hurtful.”
Children and Family Services agrees, and so we are greatful to foster parents like Delphia, who help us keep brothers and sisters together, while their parents work out their problems. Delphia is 70–though she certainly doesn’t look it–and has been fostering for 15 years.
Right now Delphia is caring for two sets of sisters, one set aged 7 and 10, the other 8 and 11. Also on hand during my visit were two of her great granddaughters, Ravyn, 13 and Isabel, 5. This was a lot of girls in the house, all chirping and giggling.
“It’s like they’re all sisters,” Delphia smiles, “they play and go to school together.” At any given time Delphia has at least four siblings in her home.”
Delphia got into foster care when the grown foster daughter of her sister-in-law lost her son and daughter to the child welfare system. She had known Delphia from church, and one day begged her for help. Delphia called the social worker, and ended up going to foster parent orientation. Shortly thereafter she was caring for these little children as her first sibling group.
A sudden thought came to mind, “Delphia, where was your husband when you were making plans to have these little kids move in with you?” “Oh, he was at work,” she said breezily. A second later, we both burst into laughter. The children ended up living five years with the Lawsons. “Was it hard saying goodbye,” I asked her.
“When they left I went out into my backyeard by the rose bushes and just let it all out. I told myself that I’m never gonna let this happen to me again. And you know, I was calling my own grandchildren by the foster kids’ names. I just missed them so.”
But Delphia’s resolution went by the wayside when another sibling group moved in with her.
The first two children did well and both went to college. Both still come to visit the home that gave them loving shelter. “I’m here, I tell all the kids. I’m not going anywhere.” And they all come back. Year after year.
I wanted to talk to the girls and thought it might be difficult to get them to talk about living with Delphia, whom they call Aunt June, an old nickname. They bounded into the dining room, all smiles, and crowded around us.
What do you like about Aunt June, I ask. And there’s an explosion of answers:
“She’s BEAUTIFUL!”
“She’s NICE!”
“She feeds us good!”
“I can talk to her!”
“I trust her!”
“She gives us candy!”
“She’s a good cook!”
These girls clearly adore their Aunt June. “A good cook, huh? What does she make?”
“Peach cobbler!”
“Banana pudding!”
“Ribs!”
“Collard greens!”
“Corn Bread!”
“Carrot cake!”
“Broccoli!”
“Corn!”
“Chocolate cake!”
“Rice!”
“Cookies!”
“Vanilla pudding!”
I couldn’t write fast enough to get it all down. But what about the chores? Do they have any work to do around the house? The answers were a little slower in cominng–with a bit less enthusiasm.
“Clean our rooms.”
“Take out the trash.”
“Wipe the table off after dinner.”
“Don’t be too loud at night.”
“Go to bed on time.”
“Take a bath.”
“Pick tomatoes and beans from the garden.”
Delphia smiles as the girls emote. And there’s nothing but pure love shining from her beautiful brown eyes. A big home with siblings. Happy. Loved. Safe. Together.
Taken from Contra Costa County Foster Families Newsletter, Jan/Feb 2006